Every now and then, I like to take a step back and observe my life.
Examine what makes me tick, and what makes me sick.
Identify what I revel and to what I rebel.
So, I step back and look.
Bliss, I slowly exhale.
I lie back, close my eyes and let the words unfold.
Like a flower blooming, its petals slowly inching skywards.
A pulsing heart, I swim in.
On the field, I sit, and peer at the stars in the night sky, twinkling away.
Each a memory, of what I had, of whom I was, of who I was with, of why I did not.
Aggressive? No. They stay in their places, a distance away because I have moved on,
but visible to direct my path ahead.
Every once in a while, there will be a shooting star.
Every once in a while, a star will blink its final wink.
Have I lost any meaning in life?
Nay, it has merely grown.
I know who I'm going to marry.
I see ahead a rough sketch of the future I will have.
Above all, I am still charging ahead with zest for life.
Work has grown in responsibilities.
Yet, I don't find it disconcerting.
I lean forward and delight in it with gusto.
Though sometimes, the people that I seek advice from, aren't as forthcoming and helpful.
And that's when I tell myself, not to take it to heart, and not to judge.
Occasionally, what tempts every man comes to tempt me too.
Fame, fortune, pride, status, recognition and more.
I confess I wouldn't mind a fortune.
I can use it to clear bills and debts.
I've grown farther from most friends.
At the same time, I'm learning how to positively affect
within a short frame of time.
Which I feel is necessary, because in the current era
of instant noodles and whatsapp and facebook and whatnot screaming for our attention,
Short and sweet and memorable should do the trick.
If I could go back in time, would those stars be lesser?
I think not. I had good times with no regrets.
People got hurt yes. I did, too.
But it made me stronger. I can only hope it had the same effect on them.
Sometimes, people remark how they would not be like that if they were not hurt
and maybe now in bliss, my eyes are veiled.
Thus, when I look back, I can only see how grateful I am for those hurts
Else I wouldn't be who I am at where I am today.
The road ahead isn't smooth.
But where's the fun in a smooth road anyway?
One can't see the sunrise unless one climbs up
and reaches the summit.
