reflections of a worker in the mrt train on my way to work

standing beside the door while i lean against the glass with my butt pressing on it, un-deterring the person behind me from leaning his face on it. the glass. not my butt.
Seeing people of various shapes and sizes, each lost in his or her own world.
staring out the window as if looking at each other is an offence. surely, a smile to a stranger ain't that hard to do?
Silence prevails around me, as I minimise my world to the grooving samba music pouring into my ears from my headphones.
i rock to my own rhythm. trying unsuccessfully to be inconspicious among the other passengers rocking with the rhythm of the train.
and this is what i observe about people. regardless of age, gender, race or religion.
they look straight. never down or up. but straight ahead. their eyes slwoly recoil in their sockets as their mind travels elsewhere. their body attaches itself to the floor of the carriage. their eyes blink with their own tempo. eyeballs rooted in a position.
when their destination is announced over the intercom system, the small wheels in their mind turns, invisibly barking out oders to the various body parts. their hands uncoil from the pole while their shoes break away from the floor.
and did i mention the perseverance of office people? no matter how crowded the carriage is, they will always push on and persevere to gain a foothold in the train carriage.
Such is the never-ending struggle that exists everyday in the small carriage of a train.

today! mental hurricane!

well, these few days have been rather interesting. I do think the air in my office has an interesting relationship with my body's natural gas emissions. i've been farting more nowadays. but sHhh.. you didnt hear it from me..

hMm.. received my results today.. not that bad.. quite good.. i passed all.. got 2 Bs 2 Cs and one C+.. cool right.. three grades that are in ascending order.. no A or D to stop the pattern.. but that's me.. i dont aim high.. my pastor says its a man of simple faith. (shrugs) why worry? (winks)

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I had a rather severe headache today.. it started as a minor irritation somewhere in my head (which of you knows which part of your head aches when you have a headache?) before progressing to a damaging headache akin to that of hurricane Kristina. It was definitely a stage five.

I meant to go for band pract after work but my mind decided i could take the ache no more so i headed home. for panadol. and of course, a bath. (people stink after work. naturally)

the governor of my mind immediately raised a state of emergency - no talking except when necessary - and devoted all available resources to prepare for the 'hurricane'. Water, air and food. ok, so not really in that order

the hurricane played hokey-pokey in my head as i walked back home.

i finally reached home. after survivors of my mind desperately tried to find the button to disconnect my mind from my body. unsuccessfully of course.

I stepped into my house. And the governor initiated the recovery process. First came the line of troops and sandbags and shelter to brace against the fury of the Hurricane A.K.A. Panadol Actifast!

Next came supplies for hygenic and sanitation purposes/I took a bath. Then came much needed food and water supplies - dinner with drinks.

Hurray! As the supplies came in, the hurricane abated. Soon, the sun came up and life went on. naturally my mind was affected and is still reeling from the catastrophe but i am happy to say that electricity and the basics have been restored. Railway stations (trains of thought) are fully functional.
In retrospect of the crisis, i would like to extend my warmest gratitude to my dear who worried for me and provided emotional recovery and enforcement services in the unprecented crisis. Many thanks!D

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Today was the last day of my mentor at work - Stanley Huang. Aged 19 and attached to a girl my age, he has been a wonderful mentor and teacher. he taught me how to slack. and enjoy life. and not to worry and be happy. which accounts for the blog song. :D

Always remember!!!

Don't Worry AND Be HAPPY!

Today! First Day of Work!

well. today was my first day of work. as an erm, data entry i think. though i should be called the filer. Six fifty per hour, five day work week. it's quite reasonable. It's at raffles places. which does pose of a problem to my schedule cause i have band pract on mon and fri at 6.30 and i end work at 6.15. oh well. i'll have to go late for band pract unfortunately.
Anyway, it's a very friendly work environment i have and my job is relatively simple. All i need to go is to search for files. in a different building about two streets away. in three different locations of that building. something akin to that of a search-and-rescue operation. cause i either photocopy some important portions of that file in that building or i bring it back to my "office" to photostat. Best of all, there's free flow of drinks! Cup drinks la. coke, F&N grape, ice lemon tea and 100+.
It would definitely be challenging on friday when my "senior" or the person i'm replacing has his last day of work. It is Very vEry veRy verY interesting to note the different wages of different people of different educational qualifications. but that's another post for another time. til then, take care and God bless!

these few days.. quite ok..

hMM.. these few days have been quite ok.. went out with friends.. went out with Her.. helped some friends in maths and accounts.. made people laugh.. a good thing to me. i have always believed in humour and how it would help people enjoy life. not that i shun people who are depressed or people that are saddistic. yet, i would have to admit such people do arouse my curiosity about them. no doubt some are attention-seeking but the minute and fragile world that these people create for themselves make me wonder about the huge friendly world of love that i live in.

joy. its a weird thing aint it. the more u give it and sprinkle it into people's lives, the more you'll receive it. but joy ain't defined by jumping screaming yelling singing. it's not just facial or physical deeds. smiles, laughter in one's eyes and a little skip in one's walk are all symptoms of joy. and the only one to have joy is? to put Jesus then Others then Yourself.

selfishness. most of us were born with the inkling that whatever we do is for Our gain. not for the guy on your left. not for your sibing. but YOU. and this could possibly be the reason for the un-graciousness happening in our society right now.

Imagine a bank calls you up to tell you that you've emerged as a winner in a lucky draw. You win 86 400 dollars. per day. but, (there's always a but, ain't it) any money leftover at the end of the day would be taken out of the account such that you will always start each day with $86 400.

Here comes the problem. how would you spend that amount of money?
(cue: devil on right shoulder, angel on left shoulder appears)

You have such an amount of money every day. 86 400 seconds. 1440 minutes. 24 hours.
How would you use it? and for what benefit?

ArGh! My Hair!!!

Today wasn't really a nice day.

I was forced to go to the barber. and my parents were there, telling the barber which parts of my hair should be shortened, which was practically everywhere.

Scene 1: I step into the barber. My dad behind me. I sit on the chair. The barber comes. My dad puts his hand horizontally across the back of my hair, near the middle and tells the barber: "cut to this length". Naturally I protest! but sadly, to no avail.

all goes well. unto..

Scene 2: Barber's shaver emits a strange sound. He pauses. then proceeds to the side of the table where he starts using a screwdriver to bang against you. I try furiously not to let the horror be evident in my eyes. thoughts wander through my mind. What if.. it malfunctions while on my head? Barber tries the shaver against his hand, and (i hope) it seems to be working fine and he resumes shaving my hair off, like nobody's business. At the side, another barber starts combing his hair and looking at himself in the mirror with eyes of admiration. oh man! is he that vain? or is he going for a date i wonder?

Scene 3: I'm in mourning. My sideburns are gone. Little do I realise how much i love them till they're gone. I have lost many of my little ones. my ltitle strands of hair. i feel like a nerd and a toot.

Scene 4: Enter my parents. "eh.. not bad what!" "quite nice leh". Is it me or are they treating me like a small kid? as though giving a small kid a lollipop could make him forget he fell. truly, any doubts i had about my age as viewed by my parents are gone. all clarified and accurate. they think i'm seven.

Scene 5: I hurriedly put the hat on my head, to cover the invisible scars that remain. The barber momentarily uplifts my spirits by saying "you poly student? I thought you're secondary". Yah! I'm not that old. but. oh man. poly student with short hair is.. yuck!


Scene 6: At home. I look in the mirror. "Who is this bald monkey?" I ponder to myself. Thank God I still have my goatpee. Sorry, I mean goatee.

our first month.

To my Dear:

Ain't it amazing how time flies? we've already been together for one month. 31 days. 744 hours. 44640 minutes. 2678400 seconds.
Since that day on 12th August 2005 at 5.45pm on that bench in Bedok Reservoir Park, life has been quite a breeze. with you. The times we walked as we talked. around Bedok Reservoir. Around Tampines Central Park. and numerous other hdb void decks. and the times at Long John Silver too. ;)
Sometimes I look at us and I just thank God. For you. For us. For the Spirit between us.
I have no idea how long we'll last. but let's leave that to God, shall we? it would be more exciting. every time that i'm with you becomes an experience. and a test. a test of my own sensitivity and patience and a showcase of my strengths and flaws. the ability to make you laugh makes my day.
I promise that I will love you. For better for worse. For richer for poorer. in sickness and health. when the world is falling down i will always be around. though the tides may change the winds may blow. i know you know that i'll love you.
Happy anniversary dear. 1st of numerous anniversaries to come. :D

Yours lovingly,
Loves

P.S. nice song? :D specially chosen! :)

hMm.. love... and its relationship with creativity..

love is simple yet bizarrely complex.

it has its limitations. you cant really do much in love, can you? you can only hug or cuddle or hold hands or kiss. or petting. but that's practically about it. sure you can rescue your loved one who is standing in the path of an oncoming car (how often does this happen) or you could make some personal sacrifices to please or to be with your loved one. but these are things done more for love than things done in love.

but is love all that bad? obviously not! why do people put so much effort and time into seeking love then? but one thing is for sure. love promotes creativity.
look at the different methods of expressing one's love. excluding body language, one has limited choices. you can do it verbally (who wouldn't wanna hear the three magical words) literally (sms or a poem or a note or a letter or a card) or physically through gifts and such. but that's about it. yet what makes each exclamation or proclamation of love so different and unique from the other is its creativity. i love you. i <3 you. the different? its creativity.

so, would i be right if i said love is creative? perhaps. after all, love would have to have creativity in itself so as to stimulate the creativity in the person to be creative in the expressions of love. creative in the things done in love. and creative in expressing one's love. no doubt we've all been hugged numerous times but each one is special and different from the other. what's the difference between a kiss and a kiss? the kiss.

therefore. love does have a unique relationship with creativity.

well.. interesting days..

hMm.. have yet to blog for a few days.. so i shall.


Basically, nothing much happened? I mean, I could tell you about the gift my gf gave me on fri.. and i could tell you i might give her a similar gift too.. but what for?

just like i could tell you that i didnt realise how many temp jobs there were until i went to www.jobsdb.com, www.jobstreet.com and er another site. i could tell you its sortof a bit hard to get a temp admin job. cause toopid polys decide to have their breaks during e off-peak season. i could tell you about my job interview on monday for a post that i dont remember applying for? and they say i got shortlisted. i wont be surprised if that means they cut off names that were longer than five letters?

i could tell you that i cant wait to see my gf but that would be unfair to those unattached. i could tell you how when i was single, everybody around me looked and were single and now that im attached, everybody around me look and are attached. perspective, i believe.

i could tell you that though i know not how i've changed, i have changed. everybody does. but more of those in a relationship. i could tell you, im rather happy for my dear's kor. hee.

but what for?

so much information passing around that we dont really grasp the significance and true meaning of each fact. we view it as a bottle and some water inside and not realising that its half-emptyness or half-filled-ness reflects our outlook on life or its intricate and explicit details.

no doubt, i could post the various dirty stuff of my relationship but what for? sex sells. but not all things that sell has sex in it. weird eh? how a friend third-degree me on how many times i've kissed, and who initiated and stuff. curiosity? or a subtle warning to go slow?

i wonder. do i still whizz u away when you're with me? or have we entered something of a different stage? soon it'll be a month. 31 days. 744 hours. 44640 mins. 2678400 seconds. so fast. time flies by. love speeds it up i think i can safely say?

so, to conclude. nothing happened. really. nothing. yet.

weird hmm? in the earlier stages i would get so sensitive and self-blamet-tory whenever ya dont reply my msg or i haven heard frm u for quite some time.. trying to read between ur lines.. yet now we are.. first month's here. no doubt i trust u more than last time. and i dont get tt worried or self-blame-tory anymore.. and.. now comes the thoughts.. of whether u trust me as much as i trust you..

to the place of relief

well. my toilet's going to undergo a major facelift so this post is dedicated to this place of rest which has relieved me in the past few years.


You helped me in times of need
in times of pain and agony
you have heard my every sound
from forte (loud) to pianossimo (very soft)
from an unsteady tempo of varying notes
to the regular speed of rushing water

You relieved my every burden and made my day brighter
You gave me so much pleasure and made me so much smarter

you heard me as i bathe, my out-of-tune songs
you watched me as i cried, when i was down and out
you know me as i wake, my eyes groggy and unclear
you see me as i'm about to sleep, the toothbrush within my teeth

you know the clothes i wear, the various colours and sizes
you watched me as i shaved, as i gelled and as i sprayed
deodorants and others, gel and wax and clay
naked to fully clothed, you have seen them all.

to the place that has sustained and received what i do not want
to the room that has provided me rest, inwardly of course
i thank you for your patient and i know if you could speak
the first thing you'll say would be : "can i not receive your shit"

hMm.. havent updated for aawhile

haven't updated for awhile so i'll make this as brief as possible.

I'm quitting C.M.M. Council. Due to some unforeseen events that would be taking place, i have decided to leave the council. If I stay, i would only have a mediocre level of participation which is not good. at all. therefore, to my fellow council members, I thank you for an enriching experience in council. I know some of you might be thinking what for join the council only to quit after a few months. I can offer no valid reasons except that life is full of twists and turns.



Today was rather fun. Met up with J before my paper. finished the two hour paper in half an hour. and something hilarious happened before i left.

There were two invigilators. An aged male and a young female. During the exam, a fellow coursemate fell asleep, two tables to my diagonal left. The female invigilator walked past and noticed his head slumped on the table. she peered over his shoulder before walking to the front of my table to inform the other invigilator that the guy was sleeping. when she noticed i was looking at her, she came up to me and said: "He's sleeping. Should i wake him up?" Surprised, i could only shrug my shoulders. Then, the other invigilator, the aged male walked past to the table of the sleeping prince. he looked down , as if observing a person sleeping for the first time, before taking a few steps back from the table. he then proceeded to observe the sleeper.

she might have been a new invigilator and he might have been bored. or not. who knows?

ciao!

Diaries of A Domesticated Male Part 1

Thus begins the diaries of a domesticated male. the first entry and possible the last.

Dear Diary,
I did housework today. I guess it could be considered part of my domesticated education system at home. It includes cooking, doing the dishes, washing the kitchen, folding the clothes, ironing, vaccuming and cleaning my room and a few others that have yet to be listed. All at a special price of a condom. or the lack of it.
I learnt foam-skating today. in the kitchen. while washing the kitchen, i discovered how the soap and foam on the floor reduces friction between my soles and the floor thus allowing me to roam, sorry skate, freely about. it is a wonder why Singaporeans want to go to do ice skating where they can have experience the same thrill right at home. However, please be warned, the level of excitement and thrill varies on the surface area of the kitchen floor. it would be stupid to say please do not try this at home since i am doing it at home but please, learn how to brake. this diary will not be held liable for any injuries caused as a result of foam-skating.
I have long learnt not to argue against the non-volunteering 'job' of folding the clothes. Now boasting of ten years of experience in this line, i have learnt the art of folding clothes, watching tv, messaging thru my handphone and having a conversation with my sister, all at the same time. Multi-tasking you say? I call it daily living and survival. In a world where man eats man and in a family where one has to find a balance between diplomacy and forcefulness/stubborness, the survival of oneself is important.
Alright. the clothes are beckoning. Thanks for tuning in to the exploits of 'Diaries of A Domesticated Male Part 1!' Till next time, i'm domesticated male tuning off.

Yours domestically,
Male.