Monday, April 30, 2007

feelings. feelings.

Close every door to me
Hide all the world from me
Bar all the windows
And shut out the light
Do what you want with me
Hate me and laugh at me
Darken my daytime
And torture my night
If my life were important I Would ask will I live or die
But I know the answers
Far from this world

Listen

His eyes upon your face
His hand upon your hand
His lips caress your skin
It's more tHaN I CaN STAND!

Listen

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Untitled

Have I waded in too far
Dug my own grave, ensnared myself
Tied the loose around my neck
And choked the life out of myself

I look in the mirror
And see a confused beast
Its emotions raging
Its character but many facets
On one, it's written 'humour'
On another, it's written 'perverse pleasure'.

Each phase of life
Each new environment
Each friend
has a preset of facets.

Oh, the storms that come
The howling wind
The thunder as the waves crash
Against each other
Onto each other
With each other
And with dry land.

The storms that arise
within man's heart
The fury within.

The complex confusion
The passions that cry out
In fear, in preservation
The tears that pour forth
As joy turns into grief.

Like a deer caught in a truck's headlights
Like the un-caged bird, confused by its freedom
The feelings when two friends of different settings
merge and become one.

The shells.
Hard. Cold. Thick.
They don't break but they fall off.
They don't cease to exist
They just remain stagnant
For a little while
Till they are worn again.
Till the heart is crushed.
Till the mind is gone.
Then the shells resurface.

Once more.

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Love

Love.

That makes a man woo his wife everyday, from scratch
Because she suffers from Alzheimer's Disease
And forgets who he is the next morning.

That makes a boy a man
Cause he marries at seventeen
To his first and last love
Who died a day or two
After the wedding
Leukaemia

True. It's nonfiction books.
But they arouse the desire
The yearning in us
That existed since we were born
And would stay till we're dead

To love and be loved.

What's Your Love?

Friday, April 27, 2007

the battle

you see it everyday
it happens all the time
at city hall
or raffles place

Train A is packed to the door.
Its doors have yet to close.
Train B zooms in, unleashing its cache of Train-A-hungry passengers.
They run across.
They stop when they see the full capacity.
They stare at those in Train A
They stare back.
Their eyes go 'You take one step into this squashed-like-sardines-in-a-can train carriage and I will personally sardinize you'
Those from Train B stare back
Their eyes go 'Should I or should i not. There is an empty gap, right there. Oh but it's near e door. What if e door closes on me.'
Then the doors close.
Our eyes meet.
They're furious they didn't jump in
I'm thankful I didn't get permanently slimmer.

And reruns are available every evening.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

MY FIRST PRESS CONFERENCE

I attended my First Press Conference Today!

It was with Olivia Newton-John. And, she's like 59 but she looks in her early 40s! gosh. I've no idea if it's exercise or yoga or make up. After all, I did read up somewhere on the web that she loves to do her own make up and stuff.

But! That wasn't the most shocking part.

The most unbelievable part is that the first person I saw when I stepped into the press conference is my dear motherly lecturer cum tutor cum person-in-charge of me during my internship: MS ANGELA CHEE.

I confused my mind kind of blanked out when I saw her. She didn't see me at all when I stepped in, so my mind was busy trying to figure out how I should call her. Chee? Angela? Ms Chee? Ms Angela Chee? Cher?!

So in the end, my mind settled on, 'Ms Chee!'

And she looked up, [I'm probably the last person she expected to see], and I could tell she was surprised to see me, cause she asked me, 'What're you doing here?'

Of course, under normal circumstances, that questions would be classified as one of concern and curiosity. After all, I should be in like some office doing some desk bound job and stuff. However, at a press conference 'What're you doing here?' does seem to be a little off the mark don't you think?

Can't quite remember what I replied though I'm fairly certain it went along the line of 'I'm here for the press conference'. Which, has gotta be the worst impromptu answer I've ever gave.

Should have said something like 'I pon internship or i skipped work today' kinda thing, that fits well with my lame satirical humor.

Oh and guess what! There were more fans than media at the press conference! They should have called it a fan conference! And they wore pink!

Well, cause Olivia Newton-John's a breast cancer survivor, [in fact she even set up an Olivia breast cancer test kit!] so the local breast cancer survivors kinda look up to her as a role model and such and they certainly came out in full force to support her!

I felt ridiculously under-dressed, [I was in a simple black shirt and jeans], or rather I felt I wore the wrong color. Not That I should worn pink, mind you. I just might get mistaken for a breast cancer survivor. Though it can happen in men. maybe it should be moob cancer.

It was fun though. The questions that came up, from meeting the pope, to singing a duet with her daughter, to dragonboat racing. And the photographers. Gawd. It's like so bright can. And you wanna flash somemore. And your flash is not facing e front kind but facing the side. And I'M AT YOUR SIDE. i know la, I have small eyes and such, but doesn't mean I'm immune to your numerous flashes.

Can't these gossip-thirsty, bloodsucking photographers spare a thought for a poor, under-dressed, intern here?

Oh well, tomorrow would prove to be a fun day. A recording with Jean Danker. I pray she doesn't wear pink. If not, I'll just freak out. Honest.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

strangely

Strangely, the last thing to be sick from, from interning at a Audio Production House would be flu. After all, I work in a winter wonderland; where the office temperature is 20 degrees celsius, and I'm in the office from 9.30 to 6, Mon to Fri-s, and never encounter any heat save for lunch hour.

After all, the sicknesses associated with an Audio House would probably be advice falling on dear ears and ear blocks. Not that which affects the nose or throat.

But oh well, the flu just had to choose me to infect and produce nosewater out from. Honest. It was like a tap last night, dripping non-stop. Strangely it stopped dripping when some guy with the cherry flavoured fag walked past. [gasps] Does fag smoke have a healing property related to the nose?

Well, I should be able to drip out a bottle full. Anybody interested in purchasing freshly made nosewater? It's just like newater except with a smellier o.s. [nOSewater]. Healthy and biodegradable too. The water i mean, not the bottle. No sampling allowed of course.

Oh well, back to winter wonderland tomorrow. Guess I could try out the hypothesis that listening to music speeds up one's recovery.

Bah, the paperwork needed to do when written an M.C. Why can't it all be computerised! Bah, paper. Save The Earth, use ultraviolet stamps to give M.C.s, and let every office have an ultraviolet scanner. Saves the earth. Till you realise earthly resources is needed to generate electricity for the scanner to work.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Do Or Do Not.

5 things never to do when riding on an escalator:


1) Do not direct your burp at the stranger around you. Yes, we know you've eaten, and we know the food was good, but there are more civilised ways of expressing your, erm, gratitude.

2) Do not yawn and then look at the person standing beside you with your mouth wide open. Unless you have gold teeth and wish to donate a few to me.

3) Do not ask your kid if he/she needs to put put/do business/poop/do big business. For crying out loud, we just came out of a food establishment!

4) Do not stand in the middle as if you own the escalator. There are people who are in a hurry and you standing there, with the plastic bags at your side, are proving to be not just an obstacle, but the cause of a huge jam.

5) Do not fart. This needs no explanation. Unless, of course you are certain everybody else on the escalator has a blocked nose. If this should be the case, fart at your own will.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Attach. ment

Hurray! It's Wednesday, the middle day of the week! Two more days before my First week of internship ends.

It's been an insightful experience. The office is big, honest, I could lie down in the hallway and there's still space for another half of me. It's like even bigger than band room in school. But strangely, it doesn't look that big on first sight, I'm guessing cause they didn't really decorate it that much and renovate or design their interior.

It's very very simply designed. Posters signed by artistes and celebrities line the walls, a kindof budget version of a Hall of Fame. There aren't any other decorations or ornaments. Few plants in the office. There are big wide windows, which are good, because it brings life in, but. It faces all the other tall office buildings in the city, so it kinda makes me feel rather dwarfed.

And their CDs! Gosh, Imagine the scene in Matrix where Neo is shown the full arsenal of guns to choose from. That's like my office! Except it ain't guns but CDs. And it's placed on sliding shelves on all four walls. And there are three sets of sliding shelves at each position. So, it's 12 sliding shelves, with 80% filled with CDs per shelf.

It's kinda like working at HMV or Gramaphone or other Music retail outlets except it's more compact. Kinda like Neo and The Sliding Shelves. Could be a bestseller!

Their genres are like of all kinds imaginable. From Cantonese Opera to English Oldies, to Bassoon Solos, to Japanese Rock, to Sinhalese Music! Any genre you like, they have!

I'm surrounded by music! Literally. and physically too. There's like a certain excitement when I see waveforms.
Wonder if there's something called a waveform fetish. hmmmm

It's been rather slack. I'm doing an assortment of tasks, from mixing audio to data entry to QC-ing audio programmes that ranges from an hour to two hours. My work is to listen. Honest. Though I am rather glad at the end of the day for silence and natural sounds. After all the studio stuff and all, a car horn sounds so pleasant to the ears. Even the pulsating rhythms of footsteps of the office crowd rushing for the train is music to my ears. Not that what I'm listening in office ain't music, but, just a different kind.

Kinda cool, breathing music.
Their air con makes me fart a lot.
And, no, I don't fart music.

A Smile

While on the train home, I saw a familiar face, whom upon some mental searching, turned out to be my Sec 1 crush. There we stood, both at different doors, ten feet apart. And we smiled.

You know, I guess I'll never cease to be amazed at what time does to a person. The last time I saw her would be 2 years ago, and now she looks so matured. She looks like an office worker in her early twenties. Not that I'm saying she's old or anything, but I kinda started to wonder, what about me. After all, the other ushers and CSOs don't believe I'm 19, and most demand to see my I.C.

And, her complexion is super good can! It's like flawless! Oh well, she definitely has a lot of Vitamin D, since she's in vb for like 6 years?!

Well, one thing she's definitely good at would be smiling. Of course, a set of straight teeth would help too.

Alas, the past can never be forgotten, only remembered, rekindled and refreshed time to time.

I think I'll not never drive to work, but rather, take the public transport. It's the only way to meet history in the face.

A smile. And it said volumes. Or have I read too much?

Sunday, April 15, 2007

that

That which nearly drove him mad.

"His eyes upon your face
His hand upon your hand
His lips caress your skin"

That which is sharper than a saw with a thousand teeth
That which is unseen yet evident

That has slaughtered thousands
and thousands more waiting to be slaughtered

That changed his world
of light to devoid of light
of life to lifeless
of love to hatred of love

That which broke her heart in a flash
That shattered their dreams
'dreams'

That which goes by the name of
jealousy.

Monday, April 09, 2007

If

If I were to say you're smart, would it be because you're smart and what I've said is a fact and could be deemed as a confirmation by you of your intelligence, or could it be because I see you lack self-confidence and by saying that, your self-confidence would increase and you would be smart, indirectly because of my words, and my words indirectly become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Perhaps this is why the future is never made known to us, not just because of the many paths that lay ahead of us, but simply because our minds would not stop dwelling on it should we know what we are to be in the future.

If you were to know you will become a successful painter in the future, would you aim to score well for art and gain entry into an Arts College and learn about painting and mastering the techniques? Or would you simply choose whatever that interests you at that point in time, and as much as you can, not think too much about what you will be in the future?

Perhaps the reason why we never know our future is because knowledge of our future would impede our learning and limit our range of vision. After all, why consider a scientific career when you know you will be a musician? Or think about being a chef when you foresee you will be an architect?

But then, if I were to say I like you, would this be a self-fulfilling prophecy by itself, that is, I would end up liking you because my heart affirms what my mind thinks? Or is it merely a factual statement of confirmation of the existence of feelings towards you?

Would proclaiming the fondness spur on the growth and development of feelings; where every difference is viewed with a diffusion of excitement, and every similarity magnified gleefully? Or would it be the foundation of the feelings; like ploughing the field before you sow the seeds?

Maybe I can't stand and watch my friend be disheartened again and can only stand from afar. So that he won't suffer. But wouldn't I then be selfish, since I have yet to take into account your feelings?

I pray it won't be a choice I have to make between who to side on. For love should not breed quarrels or be the cause of conflicts, but rather it should heal wounds, bond hearts, unite minds and forge and strengthen relationships.

If it should hurt, if it should cause sorrow or despair, if it should sow seeds of jealousy, rage, malice or hatred, if it should break bonds and sever ties, if it should stand in the way between peace and merry making, then it is not love.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Airport

air·port
–noun

1) a tract of land or water with facilities for the landing, takeoff, shelter, supply, and repair of aircraft, esp. one used for receiving or discharging passengers and cargo at regularly scheduled times.

2) A venue where people belonging to the male gender makes full use of their eyes to ogle at females of other nationalities

3) A training ground for toddlers on walking using shoes that squeak with each step

4) Place where young couples stroll and enjoy passionate moments together

5) The point of no return

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Imagine...

Imagine the glass doors slide open as it detects you. As you take a step forward into the venue, the floor tiles light up to highlight the path to the nearest available seat. The chair gently wheels out, and then moves back in again upon detecting your weight. After a Welcome message is softly broadcast, the menu, in the form of a hologram, radiates in front of you. Through lighted controls on the table, you turn pages of the menu.

A microphone that's positioned facing towards your mouth absorbs your order. While you wait, you whip out your Laptop and check your email via the free wireless internet provided.

Your meal comes and you cleanse your hand with the alcohol-free handwash mist spray located at the side of the table. As you eat, an automated service asks you if you wish to have music of any genre softly played.

You agree and music that complements your meal is softly played, with surround sound. Yet, amazingly, the volume of the music is scientifically adjusted, taking into account your profession, age and health history, such that only you can hear the music and surrounding tables are not affected.

As you tuck in to your meal, a thin plastic screen slides out and shields your shirt from any stain that may arise as a result of the tucking in.

AS you complete your email, a mousepad pops out at the side of the table, where you place your membership card - the card where your browsing and order history are stored, and where the cost of the meal is deducted from the value stored within. the history aids future visits to the food establishment.

The chair slowly reverses, and a toothpick box pops out of the left handrest while a cheerful voice bids you a have a nice day!

Where?

Food Establishments of The Future!

Imagine.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Step Up Band

I just watched Step Up on my Mac and it's kinda cool, their moves and all. I think it's nicer/better than You've Got served. Maybe cause it's a mixture of ballet and hip-hop. Though it's gotten me thinking..

Imagine... a group of people.. dancing a mixture of hip-hop infused with ballet, dances of different classes merging together.. You see not just ballet moves, not just twirls and swirls but a little breakdancing and eye-dazzling movements.. and all these time.. these dancers are playing music. That's right! Music.

Just an idea I had.. Banders playing music and dancing at the same time. Not quite like Drumline though a few ideas could be gleamed from there but from other genres as well. A trumpet need not be played by the one that holds it. The slide of a trombone could be glissed out and used as a dancing prop before glissing in again. A handstander playing a saxophone.

Wouldn't it be cool and good at the same time!

Oh well, it'll only be a dream... unless of course there're people who dream the same dream.

Imagine, we could call ourselves the Step Up Band and we could go... Whazz SUB?

Monday, April 02, 2007

post concert

Well, concert's over and it's been a less packed schedule for me.

Though it's kinda weird these few nights, cause almost every night for the past week or so, I've been chatting continuously with this female friend of mine. Now she's overseas with her bestie, [i bet they're gossiping the night away], my nights have been rather quiet and lonesome to an extent.

It's hard to find a friend whom you can chat with for like around 5 hours or so online, every night and yet not run out of topics or subjects to chat about. I guess not having to link the subjects together helps keep the conversations going.

Though her appearance in my life does make me think a little and reflect back, whether my preference for a life partner leans more towards those that are similar to me or those that are different.

It's not that easy to find a friend of the opposite gender who produces thoughts of the purest nature in a man.

And, in another 12 hours time, another friend's going overseas too. I'll miss her too. haha, not surprising since according to her nick, her life revolves around me. but. it's not what you think it is. We're just friends.

I guess i prefer thinkers. Now, will thinker prefer me?

Well, at least I managed to take a couple of strategic photos. After btab concert, where I was too shy to take photo with two babes, I guessed my courage came back when I managed to take a photo with a certain someone whom intrigued me. A lot.

Band has a lot of thinkers. I'm glad one of the leaders is a thinker. Cause the previous one certainly wasn't one.

You know, despite our concert not really being that good, I can't help but see so much potential in every bander. I guess some are destined to be a soloist with no accompaniment while others are born to be nothing else but accompaniment. But whether they remain content being accompaniment would be yet another question to ponder. After all, we all have the need to be different and to make a name for ourselves, some to fame, others to fortune, and others to rags. Guess I'm an idealist of sorts.

Sometimes, it's nice to just take a backseat. Sit alone, watch the world pass by, enjoy a cup of coffee, all by yourself. To sit in a corner, and watch people having the time of their lives, like a father watching his kids at their 1-year-old birthday party, or a mother eagle who watches with pride as her baby learns to fly, or the mother who watches her baby fall down and does nothing cause she knows to learn to walk, one has to learn to fall down.

Well, below are excepts of blog posts I found on Technorati written by those who went for TP Band concert and blogged about it:

Splendid performance put up by TP's band. And win's solo was perfectly on tune and beat. Impressed sia, two thumbs up! The familiar tunes from Jubilation overture, Noah's Ark, Persis overture are still ringing vividly in my head now. - http://mofo9.blogspot.com/2007/03/fresh-updates.html


I seriously think tp is better than us right now.. Maybe cause they have more time to practice?? who knows...
I think the 2nd half repertoire of the concert was better than the 1st..

Anyway, the conductor is so cute.. the way he conduct and all.. Love watching!!! - http://my-vanilla-life.blogspot.com/2007/03/temasek-poly-band-concert.html



The band concert was gggggreat, though I missed Noah's Ark.
Good repetoire, good conductor, the best bandies. - http://secretsatsixth.livejournal.com/32555.html


Well, the concert yesterday, in my opinion, was kind of bad. Although I don't know how much hard work the other band members have put into the performance since I was there for only one week, I could tell during the rehearsals, which section still need lots of sectional/individual practices. The rehearsals were way better than the music the audiences heard during the concert. I don't know if that's the level the band wants to achieve, but I'm sure there's still lotsa room for improvement if they want to put their hearts into it. My juniors in the audience could tell me which sections were smoking away through the pieces. But then again, the pieces aren't easy, and they are a young band afterall.

It was still fun playing for the band though. - http://sumtinkwrung.blogspot.com/


TP band concert was a blast!

They played Jubilation Overture, Noah's Ark, Spirited Away, Time Remembered, Satiric Dances, Persis Overture, Just The Way You Are, Beauty And The Beast, Into The Joy Of Spring, Chanteys and Pirates Of The Carribean. They sounded good. Although had a few mistakes, but overall, they're still good. - http://thislastsong.livejournal.com/18518.html


Watched TP concert band today at TP auditorium. Overall, I thought the performance was average only. I found the pieces played by the band very inconsistant. Sorry if any of you band members sees this ah =X.

On some pieces, the bass was good while the trebble was bad. On some others, vice versa.

And they seriously need to use the piano more!!! The piano on stage was like only for show only -.- it wasn't even used for more the 5 mins!!! DIAO -.-

Lik for the song "beauty & the beast", they did not use the piano at all eventhough it is suppose to be a piano piece. The sound which came out from the band was not bad.. But it coould've been MUCH MUCH better..

And also, there were no string instruments. Maybe just ONE, if you count the piano. But then again, it was hardly used at all. I believe the pieces that the band played could've been a hell load better if they add more string instruments into the band. - http://pika-muahaha.blogspot.com/

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Internship

Yay! I've finally known my Internship Posting.

I'll be doing it at Inflight Productions located at the Riverwalk, rather near whole string of bars at Clarke Quay. So, well, you'll know where I'll be after work. [grins]

Now if only, a bubble tea shop owner would open shop there, it would be perfect! Can't you just imagine it. A bubble tea pub. It would make good business, I tell you. :)


So, out of professional curiosity about my [future] company for the next 6 months, I went to google its name. And silly me went to type in inflight productions + singapore and I was very very horrified to find that it couldn't be found. 'Surely a company in the media industry would have its own website' I thought to myself and then I kinda got a little anxious, wondering about the stability of my [future] company.

Thanks to one of my slighter-smarter friend who found their website for me! It's actually a branch of a Multi-National Company. So, well, I kinda expect to learn a lot from the company.

Heh. I can still remember going to their website and the first thing I saw was 'We ... offer ...services including tailor-made safety, training and destination videos'. SAFETY AND TRAINING VIDEOS?? I can just imagine myself editing the voice over for a plane safety video, you know those videos that show you what to do when a plane crashes; put your head between your legs yada yada. How thrilling eh!

Oh wells, at least I'm doing audio editing and not video editing so it wouldn't be too bad. I mean, I can hope that I'll do audio for a destination video. [eyes gleam with excitement] Hah. But what are the chances of an intern going overseas. Scarly I go overseas and share a room with my supervisor and he marks me down cause I snore louder than he does at night. Heh. Can you imagine my transcripts, "Passed Internship. Could have passed with commendation if his snore was softer." haha I'll definitely make the headlines.

Hee. I so can't wait for 16th April. 0930 hrs. 25 bucks per day. It ain't that bad. Well, except I gotta get a few more shirts. And my dad's 'offering' me his shirts which are like totally retro. Plain brown colour kinda shirts, that look at least ten years in age.

Money. and Shirts. Thats what I need now.