It's when you start to feel sad when you watch a CSI:Miami actor/forensic officer/person sworn to uphold the law die that you realise the full impact of the media.
Sure I've learnt all the styles, I can roughly guess how they do it and why they do it, I could write a list of the camera angles they used, the transitional effects they did, in fact, I kinda thought I was desensitized to it all, but watching CSI:Miami just now made me feel it all again.
Perhaps it's the watching the each episode religiously, as I follow the team along, and really know each character's story, that I can feel when the character dies. Or maybe, it's cause I've had experiences with death that I can empathize what the other team members feel:when one of them is taken down.
Which brings me to ponder. The effect that this the death of Speed has on me, is it due to the past experiences I had with death or is it due to the complex combination of picture and sound? Or is it because having watched so many episodes, I have a perceived connection and understanding of Speed's personality and character that I feel the illusion of losing someone I know yet knowing I didn't lose anybody?
But, if then I am living under the illusion that I know Speed, that is the character who died in the line of duty, then would that mean that the feelings of sadness that have been given life are illusional and only serve to disillusionize me? But, surely feelings cannot be falsely created? Sure, I could feign feelings that is pretend to be angry or sad or in love but then, this would be to act as if there are feelings there and not creating false feelings or feelings that amount to nothing. Or, is it simply the body lying to itself? The eyes see and and absorb and transmit the information to the brain who recognizes it as emotional and forwards it to the heart who responds with the proper emotions but because the mind sees it as a bad experience, the emotions bounces back and the heart hastily removes the content and resends the emotions, which are empty and thus counterfeit.
Oh Speed. How could you die. Oh mind. How could you lie.
