You know the type of guys that are shy to initiate conversations with members of the opposite gender, and will blush crimson in embarrassment when their crush notices them or approaches within walking distance?
I'm not one of them.
You know the type of people that live in the present, and get scorned by those who look ahead, because these people don't seem to save for a rainy day and are rather useless and not goal-oriented?
I was one of them. Well, I was only in my teens then, and I suppose the only reason why I was one of them was simply because of my strict upbringing. I had to be home within one hour after school ended or else. I wasn't allowed much freedom. Any friends I brought home were heavily scrutinized. Every female friend was stereotypically assumed to be my girlfriend.
Sometimes I'm amazed I didn't turn out to be a misfit. Maybe genes do play a part. Or my parents were very confident of my loving abilities.
Now, I still am partly who I was. I still live in the present, and partly look to the future. Some people plan out their life in detail and have a goal at every stage at their life; Get a degree by 23, get a fixed and stable job by 25, get married by 30, get two kids by 35 etc.
I'm so not one of those people. I actually don't dictate much in my life. Aimless and goal-less, some might say. I couldn't agree more, really. Cause, you see, I believe that this world is just part of my life, and I'm merely passing through.
Not that I eat drink and be merry everyday, but I tend to lean more towards intangible happiness. Sounds foolish and so childish, but I strive to remind myself not to get too caught up in the materialistic value of this world. Though sometimes I fail, and splurge on shopping but not on branded stuff.
My point being? I live my day to the fullest, knowing that if I were to pass on at the end of the day, and as I draw my last breath, be it in the bus or the train or at home, or while I'm eating or shitting, I'm content, and would live with no regrets.
Sure, there are and definitely will be actions or words that I regret doing or saying; and there will definitely be people I regret hurting. But I don't let this hurt hurt me and bring me down! I let it dissolve within me, and bring me higher, as I learn from it.
What about you? Have you contemplated life recently?
